Small (ok, BIG) Lesson

I sit on the board of a small organization.

I hold everyone on the board with high regard. Each of us is committed to the work.

Our meeting today was dysfunctional.

I was dysfunctional.

We – I should say many of us who spoke lots, listened less – were the epitome of UN-collaborative.

We were (I was) positional.

We were (I was) not facilitative of one another.

We did (I did) not, as John Ott says, “Welcome all that arises.”

I felt one of the members was incessantly condescending.

Later, over a coffee with myself, I saw clearly how others could think I was condescending.

I was too blunt, too impatient. Others offered other mal-attributes.

We all know better. This is not about unaware people.  We are CEOs and community leaders who have helped others learn how to dialogue, have collaborative and generative conversation, and create common ground.

The lesson is one we all know to be true.

Things go wrong.

We screw up.

Each of us and sometimes all of us.

Often, learning flows out of dysfunction, mistakes, poor performance.

I left the meeting blaming others.  Poor me.

Be okay with screwing up. Be okay with it because you face it, because you seek your own accountability, because you reflect, and then because you  set out to do our work, hopefully with more intelligence, grace,  savvy, and skill than just a meeting ago.

Cross posted from Tamarack CCI
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